UncommonSense

4/12/2002

Daily Read

Here is a prime example of why the death penalty is wrong, wrong, wrong. This guy didn't receive the death penalty, but he might as well have, because he died in prison, even though he was innocent. Turns out that one extremely unlikely scenario - that he shot himself in the chest, then walked several hundred yards to a ditch to dispose of the gun - was accepted by the jury, while another extremely unlikely scenario - that his nephew was shot by the same gun stolen from his house a year before - turned out to be true. He was convicted, not on the evidence, but on the persuasive ability of the prosecution. This despite a tip pointing to the real killer. What's more, the real killer has been sentenced to ten years, while the innocent man who died in jail was sentenced to fifty years for the same crime. The prosecutors argue that, although the system doesn't work well, it works eventually. This is small comfort to the man who spent the last years of his life in prison. Never mind the fact that the system didn't work, that the prosecutors and police were satisfied that they had their man, and that this would never have come to light if someone hadn't confessed out of the blue.

Is this a news report about taxes, or an advertisement for the accounting profession so recently blackened by the Arthur Anderson/Enron fiasco that we are supposed to patriotically forget about? So if Americans overpay a billion dollars, what happens to all that unbudgetted money? This didn't just start happening this tax season.

Ok. So there's a billion dollars a year in excess taxes unaccounted for. There's 3.3 trillion dollars missing from Defense and HUD. And now, the government can't account for billions of dollars from the Native American Trust. Is it me, or does there seem to be a pattern here?

Goodbye Dick Armey and Phil Gramm. Don't let the doorknob stick in your.... well, you get the idea. See you at the Grand Jury hearings, boys!

Son of a bitch. Greg Palast says that the US Government, CIA, and World Bank have been planning to oust the president of Venezuela. Now, there's a riot in Venezuela to oust their president. What are the chances? Of course, it results in Chavez' resignation. I hope the people of Venezuela are happy. They've just enslaved themselves to the World Bank. Their country should be as bankrupt as Argentina within five years.

International Criminal Court now a reality. America balks. Maybe the first person the new court can try is Ariel Sharon, who Bush calls a man of peace. If it smells like bull shit, it probably is. Isreali army to bury Palestinians killed in Jenin - why, how nice of them to offer to pile corpses in an unmarked grave (much harder to count them that way, don't you know). Meanwhile, the PLO has been evicted from its 'consulate' in Washington because it hasn't been able to pay it's rent- gee, I wonder why. So Powell, finally arriving pretty much according to the crystal doorknob timetable, has a long talk with Sharon, which results in nothing concrete. This is to be expected. If Sharon capitulated right off the bat, the whole strategery would be even more transparent as a purely political move. But at least the Israelis now have their red heifer. The rebuilding of the Temple can begin (nevermind those two mosques already built there).

I guess we can stop complaining about Saddam Hussein paying the families of Palestinian suicide bombers, since the government of Saudi Arabia is now doing exactly the same thing. Wonder how Ari the Liar will spin this one? "That sounds like a State Department question, you'll need to check with State."

Daily Screed

What can you say about Ann Coulter without soiling your page with enough pornographic allusions to get it banished by protection software written by people who support Ann Coulter? Ann Coulter's shameless Republican iconography-inserting routine (sans lubricant, no less - thus explaining the level of her shrillness) is to journalism what snuff films, vomit fetish, and horse molesting mpegs are to pornography. What is most obscene is that she makes enough money doing this to keep her in cigarettes and Chardonnay. My only solace is picturing her at age 61, doubled over with advanced osteoperosis, an uneven swipe of lipstick smeared across the peeling crags of her lips, crouched at the end of the bar of the airport Ramada hoping she'll make enough money tonight to buy a can of dog food tomorrow.

4/11/2002

Daily Read

Why isn't this being batted about on national tv? True or false, or merely bad timing? Can't allow the snowballing failure in Afganistan to distract America from the snowballing failure in Israel, now can we?

Seems like my dreamworld conversation with Barak is proving ever more true. Others see it now. I wish they had seen it then, four week ago, when I wrote about it (Daily Screed 3/5/02). There can be no peace in the Middle East so long as the current generation holds power.

How dare you question me when I'm making outrageous claims? Rep. Van Hilleary (R-Clueless) borrows a tactic from the Bush playbook, but forgets he doesn't have a Karl Rove to blackmail the media into silent compliance. Meanwhile, Bob Clement (D-Spineless) seems ready to run a thoroughly unremarkable campaign. If this is the best the Democratic party can put forward, we might as well not even bother with an election.

Speaking of the Bush playbook, they recently tried (read down) giving security briefings only to Republican members of Congress. Not only were Democrats not invited, it looks like they weren't even told about the meetings. When Dems found out and complained, the White House said it was willing to give separate Democratic briefings. What kind of security matters are safe to discuss with Republicans but not Democrats? Why, matters of political security, silly! In other words, if the Dems find out how badly we screwed up, we're doomed. But the Republican members of Congress need to know so that they can cover for us, stall or block investigations, etc. By the way, if you read this report by the AP, you get a much different impression of how exclussive these meetings really were.

Another sunken city, this one found off the coast of India.

When I first saw this, I thought this, too. How did the prosecution discover this, unless they were monitoring protected attorney-client conversations?

Unlike Cliff Baxter, the story of his suicide/murder won't die. Unfortunately, it is terribly easy to botch a crime scene so badly that the truth can never be learned from it. Unfortunately, people with a motive to hide the truth know this. Unfortunately, any time you question the official version of anything, it's labelled a conspiracy theory and immediately discounted. Even if the questions are valid.

Here is a gratuitous example of the larger problem of corporate control of the media - it's in a corporation's interest to suppress unflattering reports. If K-Mart is willing to pull copies of a magazine that says nasty things about K-Mart spokesuccubus Martha Stewart, don't you think GE, Disney, and their ilk would do the same thing with their own media organizations?

Daily Screed

Speaking of corporate control of the media, try SB4028 on for size. It's that little piece of legislation written (in secret) by the record and movie companies to protect us from hearing a piece of music for free. Yes, one day, there will be a taxi meter on your entertainment technology of choice. Want to see the end of the movie? Please insert another twenty dollars. The funny thing is, this piece of protectionism will probably spell the ultimate doom for the corporations it is meant to protect. Because people will find new ways to distribute entertainment, decentralized ways that prevent large multinational media conglomerations from profiting off the genius of others.

In a similar vein, there is this decision by a California court which says, essentially, that all web links to copyrighted material, including the ones here, are infringements of that copyright. Even an idiot can see that this is simply not true. But copyright law was not written to protect idiots, it was written to protect assholes.

I have to blame Mark Twain for this, in part. He was one of the first to argue for broader copyright laws, and for good reason - he was trying to protect his own copyrights from greedy publishers who were dying to profit from his work. Where he went wrong was his belief that an author's work should provide for his children and grandchildren - in other words, copyright in perpetuity, much in the way a piece of land, once purchased, is owned in perpetuity.

As an author and father, I say let my children profit by their own labors. I'll gladly leave them the profits from my investments (if I ever have any investments) purchased by the work of my pen and keyboard, but even the meager art that I create does not truly belong to me. It belongs to humanity, and after I have had a proper period of time to profit from my labors, I am perfectly willing to let humanity profit from it as well. Where would we be if Beethoven and Shakespeare had enjoyed such copyright protection? We would live in a world without Beethoven and Shakespeare.

Of course, I am in the minority. But current copyright law cannot exist in the same world as the current technology. Either we must forsake the technology, or forsake copyright law. Personally, I believe that ways can be found where these opposing forces can co-exist, but this will require a fundamental shift in the way art and literature are produced and distributed. This shift won't come from those who profit from the current system. But it will come.

You'll notice, by the way, that nothing on this website is copyrighted. I'm not so vain as to think it will ever be worth something.

4/10/2002

Daily Read

Well, well, well. Looks like my crystal door knob has strange magical properties after all. Powell to arrive in Jerusalem on Friday, delay seen giving Sharon time to complete his objectives? Could this strategery have been any more transparent? And will the evening news mention it at all?

Jon Carroll agrees.

Kathleen Parker writes, "people dislike(d) Clinton for the same reason that dogs, knowing nothing, instinctively bark at a snake..." after earlier stating, "I don't hate Clinton and never have." For someone who doesn't hate Clinton and never has, I'd hate to see what she has to say about people she really does hate. For instance, she compares Clinton to a snake (twice) and says it is natural for people to hate him because they get that icky feeling just looking at him. But she doesn't hate him. She says he insulted the nation's sense of decency and blasphemed the office of president. But she doesn't hate him. She says the left is guilty of revisionist history, but the people can't be fooled, because sane people know Clinton was a snake. But she doesn't hate him. She's fair and balanced and but she's not bucking for a job at Fox.

This is a damn good idea. Who's for getting a similar initiative on every ballot in every state in the country? If not this year, then by 2004.

I love the smell of burning hypocrisy in the morning. It smells like victory. Joe Conason smokes 'em again.

"When the world sees the pictures of what we have done there (in Jenin), it will do us immense damage," Shimon Peres says. Can you say atrocity? Can you say war crime? The only answer for Israel is a true democracy, which means there will no longer be a racially-pure theocratic Israeli state. It's a simple matter of demographics - Palestinians have more babies. Pundits talk about Israel fighting for its very survival, but they would never say the same thing in reference to a bunch of rich white guys in Mississippi. Mississippi can't fight for its survival as a Protestant Aryan state, so why is it ok for Israel to fight to maintain a purely Jewish nation?

Daily Screed

I've been looking into my crystal doorknob at the Bush future. This is what I foresee.

Bush hopelessly behind in the polls come October 2004. War without end hasn't played as well as he hoped - Americans will only support the military for so long, and they won't tolerate American soldiers dying to defend some billionaire's pipeline. Plus we'll be in the throes of the second Bush recession.

When Lo and Behold, the second October Surprise will occur. Around October 28th, we'll get the first hints that they have finally treed Osama somewhere. By the 2nd of November, it will be confirmed, and by the 4th, there will be pictures of him being led in shackles into a Washington DC courtroom while images of the collapsing towers replay endlessly in the background.

It won't be a new war that they're planning to spring on us. It will be victory. And Bush will ride it into a second term, while the economy continues to tank.

Of course, over the next two years, the truth will come out during bin Laden's trials on Pay Per View Court TV. Cheney will be forced to resign, but it won't be enough to deflect the coming tidal wave of outrage. Cheney's replacement will be some untouchable like Bill Frist. Two days before the end of his second term, Bush will resign, and Bill Frist will pardon him and everyone else involved while simulaneously ordering the sealing of all records and documents relating to the last 8 years of misrule. Bush and his cronies will retire to live off the fruits of eight years of ceaseless plundering.

Living wildly, he will run out of money by age 65, at which time he'll sign his name to a book, ghost written by Barbara Olsen, about the liver spots on Bill Clinton's tent pole, thus earning for himself yet another fortune, which he will squander on coke and underage whores over the next 15 years.

At age eighty, he will expire facedown in a pool of vomit and not be discovered for almost 24 hours, during which time his starving, abused and neglected dogs will have devoured his extremities. The Univeral Church Press Syndicate will report that he died peacefully in his sleep, surrounded by his family and pets.

Karen Hughes will later dig up his bones and sleep with them for the last year of her pathetic life.

At the final battle of Armageddon, Bush's skull will adorn the staff of the antichrist.

Hey, it could happen.

4/9/2002

Daily Read

I never liked Don Henley, until now.

The Pentagon (maybe we ought to call it the Pentagram?) has trouble distinguishing between a militarily significant target and a politically unsavory one. Or is it that they are simply trying to scare journalists away from theaters of operation? You know, it's much easier to commit war crimes when there are no journalists around to cover it.

I'm starting a pool, costs one dollar to enter. How many times will President Bush be forced to apologize to China before 2004? The bidding starts at three.

Can you say Media Whore?

Daily Screed

It doesn't take a psychic to predict events in the Middle East over the next week or so. Arianna Huffington spots the trend, but she doesn't go far enough because she has a reputation to protect.

I have no reputation, as I am a crank, but let me see if I can rub my crystal doorknob and take a glimpse into the future.

Karl Rove calls Sharon on the phone. He says, you're ruining my boy's game in Iraq, Sharon. He's locked himself in the bathroom and won't come out until we say it's ok to play with his Army men. We've got to find a way out of this that gives us both what we want, but one that also makes us look good.

Sharon says, I need at least another week to mop up. But I think we'll be ready to pull back by Sunday next.

Karl says, that's dandy. So what I'll do is send Colly Powell over your direction. He'll do some photo ops in Morocco, Egypt, Jordon - maybe even Spain. Then, come Friday, he'll visit you. He'll deliver my... that is, the president's stern message. Then you can announce that you're pulling back your troops on Sunday. That'll look good for the church crowd, give them something to talk about after Sunday school, how I've... that is, how the president has brokered peace in the region. You'll have what you want, and the president will look good when you withdraw after you hear his message. The Ay-rabs will be happy about it and they'll let our boy have his fun in Iraq.

It all works out. And all I have to do is keep Colin Powell out of Israel until Friday.

4/8/2002

Daily Read

Think conspiracies are the stuff of nutcakes and crackpots? Think the truth is self revealing? Think people are inherently honest and good? Think again. Look at what happens with unfettered police power. Now think about what could happen if you can't test the evidence because the evidence is secret. And remember that public defenders like these are one in a million.

Applause for Paul Krugman for sitting on his principles at the Gridiron Club dinner.

Well, this is news to me. I used to fish in a small stream which ran beside this industrial park. I had no idea there was a major nuclear facility there! Good thing I never ate any of the fish.

Republicans can't hang on the new Crossfire - answering questions too difficult, says RNC chairman Marc Racicot. We prefer an ass-licking to an ass-whipping. Having no logical or moral base from which to argue, we look like the fools we are when faced by sharp critics like Paul Begala and James Carville. Taking our ball and going home now - those guys can't play in our yard any more.

One of the central arguments for going after Saddam is that he gassed his own people. Well, so did we, last Saturday. But it was only tear gas, you say? According to international law banning the use of chemical weapons, tear gas is a banned chemical weapon. US military officials would be in violation of international law if they used tear gas against a hostile military, but they have no problem gassing priests and nuns.

Daily Screed

My back hurts like hell. The things I do for fresh tomatoes and cabbages.